:and so we return:

So. Did you miss this? Did you miss me? Is this mic on?

I had been faithfully writing this blog weekly for several years now, and I stopped in June, 2016 to hopefully finally finish my website redesign. And, uh, guess what? Still haven't done that. I have no good excuse other than having too many ideas in my brain concerning it and the actual chore of doing it. Tempted to just pay someone to do it, but I need to have as much control over it as possible.

I haven't been lax in other creative ventures, no. So I'll recap those over the next two weeks, making this a year in review. A year that had been dubbed a dumpster fire by others for various other reasons.

When last we met, I was finishing up with working on photos of Theresa from a shoot in May. I didn't do any weird Photoshoppery on these, I was quite pleased with the final results, particularly with the lighting. Unfortunately I don't really know how this model feels, I got no feedback and as far as I can see she hasn't used any of the shots herself. Which is her right, of course, but when I can see other shots used instead, and feel that they really aren't much better than mine, well, I struggle not to take it personally. I was just hoping that I was sought out more for my style rather than just for a paycheck.

I continued work on shots of Jayne that were from October 2015, and again those stood out fine on their own, but I wanted to get back to adding textures and other manipulations, and also try out some new ideas, so I got quite of few of them done, of which here are several. There are also still shots from a quickie shoot that we did after Theresa's, but I don't expect anything elaborate from those, it was more for fun while I still had the lights and backdrop still up.

I continued to try to get into art galleries, and managed to in several places, one was another toy camera show and I got another Holga shot in. I saw some examples of shots from a Diana camera that makes me want to try that. I also got a piece into the last Uforge Gallery show, and once again displayed artwork with two others in a library in Warwick, Rhode Island. Just trying many avenues. I approached a gallery on Newbury Street in Boston about a showing of my Homunculus dolls, and the owner seemed intrigued, but I have yet to get a follow up reply. I need to make more of them anyway.

One particularly unique thing that I participated in was an artist program through a newly-opened flotation therapy establishment. They offered three "floats" in exchange for artwork inspired by them. Well, I did the three floats, to varying results and nothing mystical happening, but I did meet my obligation and created artwork for them, with the final piece printed on metal, to make the colors stand out even more. The swirling colors were from many photographs taken of food coloring dripped into a tub of water and letting it swirl about. It's actually quite relaxing on its own, I recommend it. The piece was on display in the shop and is now currently part of a show in a cafe in Somerville.

More next week!

:mic check:

I've been finishing up and sending the first edits of her photos to Theresa. So far she seems pleased with them. And in other photo-related matters, next week is the deadline for submitting to a toy camera photo show. I have several shots to choose from, but I just sent off another Holga roll of film to be developed. Hopefully it'll return in time for me to see if there are any other choices.

Earlier today I was pondering whether or not I should bother creating an artist page on Facebook, since that's pretty much the last place I haven't at this point. Perhaps if I had done so earlier. But the ever-changing rules and algorithms make it seem pointless now. I've seen some artists have hundreds, even thousands of followers, but they were most likely early adopters. Posing the question for discussion on my feed, most seem to agree, so I will probably not bother after all. I already try to share this blog on as many places as possible to hopefully cast the net out further.

In the past week I had taken part in something called the "Abundant Art Show," which was really a series of lessons in promoting and hopefully selling art online through a site/blog called - wait for it - The Abundant Artist. I've actually been following it for some time, and sadly am behind in reading it (I have the problem of collecting, almost hoarding information with little time to read it, and oh how it piles up), but I thought I'd give it a try. There was actually very little info offered that I didn't already know or was doing already (other than more hashtags to use on Instagram), which further leads me to wonder what else can I be doing?

I'm scattered over several outposts on the web, and I guess I haven't done this inventory in some time.

I now have two Instagram accounts, the first one is primarily random smartphone shots and fun with filters, and the newer one is going to be dedicated to artwork alone. I've been experimenting with hashtags on that one. I still find them annoying but they do get more people to find you.

I've been on deviantArt for 11 years now. Prints and other ephemera are available there.

flickr is for more "candid" photos, not super-artsy, although I have been messing around with the different modes in my point and shoot. I quite like the toy camera one.

FineArtAmerica is another print on demand site. I haven't put much new artwork up there, mainly because I see more of a trend toward more "ordinary" art on there, to judge from the "recent sales" page on there. My (paying) audience is out there somewhere, I'm sure of it.

Etsy still seems geared more towards "crafty" art. Right now I just have my Halloween is My Xmas series on there. I'd like to put more original artwork up there, and would love to attempt to sell the Homunculus dolls through it, but I don't know how they'd survive being shipped through the mail.

Model Mayhem is generally where I post the model-oriented photos, and has been where I've come into contact with models like Theresa up above.

Ello doesn't seem to be the Facebook-killer that it was originally rumored to be, but it does seem more geared towards showing visual art than how Facebook currently is.

And then there's my current albatross, my main website, which has been languishing, waiting for a redesign, as I sit immobilized unable to even begin, it seems. Paralyzed by too many options. So I feel that I need to put other projects aside until I finally get that done. I've been writing this blog faithfully every week for as long as I can recall, and I'd hate to break that cycle, but I need to make this a priority. If I need the extra time to work on it, then I'll have to forgo the blog for that week. Or I could just post a photo or two as an update now and again. You didn't actually read all this, did you?

:persistence of memory:

Another gallery show that I submitted artwork to has declined it. Both galleries claimed that it was more because an overabundance of entries, so I'd best not take it too personally, although of course it also means that my work didn't stand out enough to rise above the multitude. Well, try, try again.

And so I continue to work. I believe this version is finished, although as per usual it's more a case of stopping than finishing.

And so right on to another. Again I think the original is fine unaltered, but me being me, I want to mess around with it. Colors textures and whatnot.

I'm not so sure about the white frame that I've added. I may mess around with that more or omit it altogether.

From out of the blue another model on Model Mayhem asked to work with me, but alas it was too short a notice. Then she mentions that she's moving to the area, so there's still a possibility for the future. I ask where she's moving from, she says Florida, and I declare her insane for doing so, as for example we just got some lovely snowfall  - in April.

:nanowrimo week one:

Technically it's only been four days of  NaNoWriMo and not a week, but eh. Currently I'm at 13,287 words. Don't drop your jaws, that's because I'm finishing up a story I had started in 2009. Right now I'm going through what I had already written and breaking the rules by editing it before I move forward. But it's nice to have a jump start. I've already found that it was a bit difficult to write on breaks at work like I did last year. We'll see if that changes. I'll probably do the majority of my writing on the weekends, most likely in coffee shops and libraries again, just to at least get out of the apartment.

I already see that my characters will need a bit more fleshing out, and I of course already have favorites. Deleted some dated references, even though I didn't stamp a year on the story, and it's supposed to take place in a near future. Don't have a precise ending in mind just yet, either. But then I didn't have one in mind when I had started last year's novel either. It's interesting to see where it can come from. It's true sometimes that the story writes itself.

In other news, I honestly had forgotten that I had contributed artwork for a book about Krampus, who is becoming so well-known that a movie about him is coming out this holiday season. But then I received several copies of the book in question yesterday. Sadly that's my "payment" for it, but the man behind it was persuasive, and I also figured, fuck it, he had actually sought me out for it, so that's flattering. And there's always hope that it could lead to other things.

I also currently have artwork on display in a library in Warwick, Rhode Island amongst other artists. I don't have the full details available at hand right now. I did have some trouble finding "library safe" artwork amongst my more recent work.

:back and forth:

This past week was mostly prep work on older artwork than creating new ones....going through the shots from last month's shoot and sending them off to the model. Out of 300 shots I narrowed it down to 90. I may do further things with them but they stand fine on their own for now, I think.

Also going through the shots from last week's shoot. Again, just simple clean up and color correction for now. I probably won't be able to revisit them until December, as most of November will be taken up by NaNoWriMo.

I was also selecting artwork for display in a show in Rhode Island, and because it's being held in a library, not much of my recent work can be shown, either because of slightly gory themes, or nudity. Interesting. So I had to go further back into my catalog than I had originally planned.

While I want to move forward and keep changing, I used to do a lot more layering with textures and lettering. Far back enough that when I had to go out and photograph said textures myself, I used a film camera. It'd be so much easier now, of course. I wonder what the places where I got them developed at thought I was doing. I like that my current photos stand well on their own, but I may try and revisit this style. Still need to have my work to stand out in some way not like others out there.

:vida y muerte:

October is here, with all that that entails. Halloween of course, and Dia de los Muertos after that. For the former I am once again setting up my "Halloween is my Xmas" series for download over at deviantArt. Part of me is curious once more to see which ones are the most popular. And no one is buying them, so...

I had been pondering trying to find some place that would display Ximena, the most recent Homunculus doll that I've made, but that was solved by it getting accepted into a gallery show for the next month. So you can see or even buy her at Uforge Gallery in Jamaica Plain, MA.

Along the Dia de Los Muertos theme, I've been also working on this project for my sister, for an online auction, doing a design on these cat banks. Note the lack of anatomical accuracy, and some of the symmetry is a bit off. That will affect the design.

Penciled lines...

...and then there were two.

Beginning with the black parts. If all goes well I'll be showing you the final results next week.

Here are some more shots from the Salem photoshoot. I have about 200 to sift through, and I'm not sure if I'll be altering them beyond their current state. I don't seem to do as much Photoshoppery as I used to, which can be a good or bad thing depending on one's point of view. I don't want to push my luck with what's allowed here on Blogger so who knows how many more that I'll show on here.

:deadline:

I believe that one reason why so many of my projects take so long to complete or go unfinished, besides the ever-present time issue, is the lack of real deadlines. I can impose fake ones, but who's going to police me on those? A lot of projects truly get done in their own time, and often spend a scary amount of time just in my head, but that doesn't increase my output.

Most gallery shows that I've entered in I've taken past works that fit the themes, if there were any, as opposed to creating a whole new piece for it, although there were a long string of shows in Salem, MA where I did do just that. So for the next batch of gallery entries I hope to do that again. The third recent show that I'm in is opening soon, which will contain the photo below. If my currently brewing plans work out, I may be out of town during the opening reception, though.

I don't have any clients to speak of currently, so I don't have that as a deadline creator, although of all people my sister has asked for my help on a few things art-wise, and they do have deadlines, so that'll serve as an impetus, one hopes. Look for alterations to these over the next month or so.

And remember, summer doesn't officially end on Labor Day, so don't rush it out the door.

:missionary:

Regular readers of this blog (and I'd like to believe that there are a few) might notice that I sometimes write more about creating than actually creating at times. I'm really trying to fix this, though it's odd that I should have to. It's still something that I enjoy, so I don't know why it should be difficult to begin at times. I can blame "adult" stuff getting in the way, as obviously I didn't have such worries when I spent hours drawing as a child, but I still don't know when I'm supposed to finally feel like an adult, even at my age, which I'm not sharing.

I just have to make it a daily habit somehow. I keep reading about writers (which I've had experience doing as well) setting aside a set amount of time a day to write, no matter what comes out at these sessions. So I'm feeling if I can't find time to draw for 15 minutes to half an hour a day, then I have no right calling myself an artist. Things may come up and get in the way; they always do, but I'm going to do my best. I've tried to draw on breaks at work, but that place is so uninspiring, very little fruit was born during such sessions. I made some attempts last night, including some ideas for the Kali piece that is crawling along in my mind, I need to get it out onto paper or monitor.

Still investigating further print options, I received one on glass recently. Like the metal print, it's best seen in person, but I think you at least get the idea of the reflective qualities here.

One of the gallery shows that I'm in had a reception last week that I went to briefly. I'm not always sure how to act at these events, especially when my artwork is only one of many others, as opposed to a show of entirely my work. It's not like I'd hover by my piece and hope people that will ask about it, although of course I watched for reactions at times. At another show, which is at work, I actually got complimented by someone on the pieces that I had on display, and the possibility of purchasing them. Now I just need to think of a price.

Making art is a solitary activity, but I still hope to find others that I can relate to and associate with. It's still a struggle. I'm actually going to attempt to meet with a group of Instagramers tomorrow and see how that goes.

I'll mention again that this blog is set up to allow comments, so it'd be nice to get some now and again. If you choose to do so anonymously, at least sign or initial your comment so I know that you're human. Assuming that I'm human as well. Blush response.

:oceanic:

As stated last week, one way I ended my vacation was by venturing out to Boston Light, a 299-year old lighthouse in Boston Harbor. They did major restoration to it last year, well ahead of next year's anniversary. As with most voyages I've taken out to into the bay it was quite enjoyable, enough to make me wonder again if there's any job doing that sort of thing for me, but of course this was on calm seas and in summer. I talked to several people who worked on the island about their jobs there too, but unsurprisingly most are seasonal, or volunteer, and not plentiful. I'm convinced that there must be something I can do in this area.

In the photo below you can see Boston in the far distance and how far out the lighthouse is.

I pretty much spent most of my time off near the ocean or other bodies of water, so clearly I am still drawn to it. I ended up in Rockport, MA on Saturday, which like a lot of seaside towns around here has quite a few galleries and artists there, another draw for me, even if I create very little artwork depicting seaside scenes. Talked to a few shop owners as well. I've found that the older ones tend to be more conversational. Some of the younger ones seem like they'd rather be anywhere else than in the shop that they're taking care of. Probably not how they envisioned spending their summers.

Two of the three gallery shows that I'm currently in are up, with the reception for one being tomorrow night. I'm going to see if I can keep going on in this way, just applying to every show possible and seeing what sticks. As ever the struggle to stay focused can get derailed by distractions, external ones or ones of my own making.

:new dusk fades:

Trying to keep moving forward. Some things are stalled, like the website and Kali picture, and the job search for a bit - I'm still in "research" mode for the latter, so maybe I can fine tune my search for jobs that are more specific. But I'm always having thoughts of other creative ventures.

I still always have a camera with me (not counting the one in my phone, which you know I don't really count as a "true" camera anyway, unless it's for Instagram), which was good when I visited Horseneck Beach in Massachusetts this past weekend. I take many pictures of the ocean and beach when I can, but I have to find a better way for them to do it justice. It just looks so much smaller and unimpressive in the cropped rectangle of a photo. Still, I try to be inventive. And it may be weird while being on a public beach, but I try to have as few people in my shots as possible.

I was fortunate to have arrived pretty late in the afternoon and stayed to catch the sunset on a peninsula close by the beach. Judging by the number of people there as well, it must be a popular thing to view. I can see why. The colors of the sky changed fluidly as the sun set, and the sun itself transformed into a red sphere as it disappeared sliver by sliver into the horizon.

As ever, more shots on my flickr page.

I remember going to this same area nearly 20 years ago and seeing the Milky Way in the night sky for the first time (usually there's too much city lights where I usually am). I would've liked to see it again, but it was not getting dark quickly enough, and I hadn't eaten since breakfast, which seems to happen sometimes on the weekends for some reason.

While the website progresses slowly, I did add some more work online, this time a collection of illustrations on my Behance page. I liked seeing the progression and improvement, however, I wish that I had more "client" work to display. I'm still not very marketable.

In good news, however, a piece of mine got accepted into a forthcoming gallery show! It's the photo below. It's at Uforge Gallery in Jamaica Plain, MA, opening July 24th. Check it out if  you want to see it in person, or maybe even buy it.

:rocket's red glare:

This past weekend being July 4th, the USA's Independence Day, gave me an obvious source for creativity, mainly fireworks. I saw a smaller display in Weymouth on the 3rd, but went to the major one in Boston on the 4th itself. I got closer to them than I ever had before in previous years, probably because I found a good spot and stayed there for two hours previous to the lighting of the fireworks. Next year I'll see if I can't get on the water itself for this or other firework displays.

They are notoriously difficult to photograph well - I saw a few "crappy" fireworks photo contests online, actually - but after messing around with the settings on my point and shoot, not my big camera, I felt that I got some good shots. A tripod would've been ideal, but I used a railing to steady the camera instead.

I continue to map out my job search strategy, but I find that I can't completely put the creativity aside while I do so, nor should I. I've entered artwork in two gallery shows so far, but no word as of yet if they've been accepted. One is for toy camera photography, and I've started using my Holga again. I also received an ancient Polaroid camera that I knew my family had buried somewhere. If I can track down some film for it we'll see what happens there. I'm hopefully having a photo shoot next month with my favorite model, if not others as well.

There's also another one of the annual art exhibits at work; hopefully this will be the last one that I participate in.

:crossed lines:

For those of you keeping score, my Tank Girl illustration did indeed get accepted into Hub Comics' "She Can Do It!" show. It'll be on display throughout June, and there's an opening of sorts on May 30th from 6 - 8 PM.

I've experienced a fair amount of vitriol over the past few hours upon learning that an alleged artist named Richard Prince has chosen as "his" latest work what are basically nothing more than blown-up screen grabs of Instagram posts. Apparently his addition to each consists merely of adding a comment at the bottom, and that seems to be enough to legally allow this, which infuriates me. It seems that this is nothing new, he's appropriated others' work in the past, but his minor changes have mostly let him get away with it.

What bothers me about this; someone using somebody else's work and creativity and making money on it, with very little effort on their part. I'm sorry but I can't see that as anything else but thievery. Use all the ironic and post-modern tags that you want, but the bottom line is that somebody else did the hard work and he's possibly getting rich off of it. People that actually defend him say that putting your work online means that it's up for grabs, which I say is bullshit. But it's is also a big reason why I'm wary of putting too much of my work on Facebook or setting up an artist page, and part of what is holding me back in my website redesign. You can do all sorts of things to try and prevent theft, but I know even just from my own research for images online for inspiration or reference that all you need to do is a simple screen grab. More evidence that people want their art for free, never mind who created it.

I was amused by the response of one of the victims, the Suicide Girls, of offering for sale the same images that were stolen at a much more reasonable price, and the proceeds going to the Electronic Frontier Foundation, a civil liberties nonprofit focused on technology.

Well, getting back to my own artwork, which to my knowledge has not been stolen yet. I was asked by my favorite model to do a drawing based on a photo from our last shoot together. I got as far as the pencils, but we both agreed I had already done this one better already, so another shot was selected.

Again it's a challenge, one that I'm hoping to overcome, to not make the drawing too complicated and of course learn to draw quicker as well. The new one took only an hour, though there's some lace patterns in the outfit that will take considerably longer.

There's quite a few other concepts that I have started years ago that I'd like to get to this summer, one depicting Medusa, the other Kali. The latter has proven most elusive to pin down, as I'm basing it on a dream, or vision, that I had of her once, and I'd like to do it justice.

:art for nothing:

No word on whether or not the Tank Girl piece that I completed last week was accepted, but I found out that the deadline was extended, which tends to mean that they didn't receive a large amount of submissions yet. Sigh. Well, I'll keep you posted.

I also got an request from somebody through deviantArt asking me to submit a piece I created of Krampus for a book about the same. Which sounds super, but as is too common these days, the "payment" is in copies of the book in question. I did question the lack of compensation, the reply was like "it is unfortunate that there is no monetary compensation, but there is exposure." Ah yes, the eternal "exposure" carrot dangled over artists. I've rarely had promised exposure lead to other interest or work. But, sigh, I'm leaning toward it, mainly because I'm not really getting much attention otherwise, so I should be happy that it's happening at all. Just tired of not getting my due.

Need to get back on the website redesign path. Part of the struggle is making one that would hopefully get some of the attention that I need to move forward as an artist.